Should I Vent My Anger? November 29 Readings: Ezekiel 24–25, 1 Peter 1, Psalm 135:1–7, Proverbs 29:9–11

Links to November 29 Readings: Ezekiel 24–25, 1 Peter 1, Psalm 135:1–7, Proverbs 29:9–11

"You can't keep your anger bottled up inside of you or eventually you will explode." I've heard that a million times (well, a lot of times anyway!). Counselors tell us that holding our anger in, keeping it to ourselves and not venting it on other people is unhealthy; damaging to the body and to the psyche.

And it is certainly a difficult thing to hold in anger when someone provokes you. Our sinful flesh wells up and simply demands that we answer back, that we defend ourselves, that we settle the score and tell the other person precisely what a terrible human being he or she is. It is an almost uncontrollable urge.

According to Proverbs 29:11, it is also the act of a fool.

A fool gives full vent to his anger,
but a wise man holds it in check. 

A fool is someone who makes wrong choices that bring destructive consequences on his life. A wise person makes the choices that bring the blessing of God. In this verse, the one who vents his anger, who follows the worldly advice to let it all out, is a fool. They choose to express the anger they feel and perhaps even feel a little better afterward. But the consequences eventually fall on them. Hurt feelings. Damaged relationships. And, strangely enough, a bitter spirit. Venting anger tends to make one more angry and produce a bitter spirit, instead of actually getting rid of anger as the pop psychologists promise.

The wise man holds his anger in check. He does not say the hurtful things he is thinking, but controls his tongue (remember James 3?) and keeps it to himself. This, according to Solomon, leads to blessing.

The wise man knows where to take his anger, his hurt and his pain. He doesn't pour it out on others, but he takes it to the One who can heal the pain. Job was devastated by tragedy, and after the foolish advice of his friends, he was furious. He took his pain to God and called out for answers. God revealed himself to Job, who learned to trust the Father even when he did not understand. Habakkuk couldn't understand how God in is justice could allow what was happening in sinful Israel and he told him so! God revealed his plan and Habakkuk's heart trusted him.  Jeremiah cried to God in sorrow over Israel's plight and God ministered grace to him.

Venting our anger to others brings no true healing to our hearts and wreaks havoc on those around us. But when we take that anger to God, when we are honest with him about it all, not only do we find the help we need in our suffering, but we become agents of God's blessing on the world around us.

Father, I do not always understand you and sometimes life not only baffles me, but it also frustrates me. I seek your wisdom and your healing. I reject the folly of the world that says I need to vent my anger on others regardless of the damage that does.