What Should I Say? August 24 Readings: Job 3-4, Romans 13, Psalm 101:1–4, Proverbs 21:6–8

Links to August 24 Readings: Job 3-4, Romans 13, Psalm 101:1–4, Proverbs 21:6–8

Job's friends, Eliphaz, Bildad and Zophar, performed one of the most amazing acts of friendship anyone has ever seen. When they came to comfort their friend Job, after he had lost his wealth, his home and his children in horrible accidents, they sat with him in silence for seven days. They simple sat there and let him know that they cared and that they were there to help him.

People often wonder what they are supposed to say or do when someone suffers a tragedy, and often end up saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. But we can learn from Job's friends. They communicated the two most important messages that the grieving need to hear.

• I care about you. 
• I am here for you. I'm going to be here for you. 

Had Job ended with chapter 2, these men would have gone down as three of the greatest men who ever lived. But everything changed in chapter 3 when Job began to cry out and express his grief, depression and despair. Look at Job 3:3-5.

May the day I was born perish, and the night when they said, “A boy is conceived.” If only that day had turned to darkness! May God above not care about it, or light shine on it.May darkness and gloom reclaim it, and a cloud settle over it.

That's when the trouble started. They lost their chance to go down in history as some of the greatest men who ever lived when they opened their mouths. Instead of supporting their friend, they wheeled out their faulty theology and tried to force Job's situation into it's parameters. They tried to explain everything God was doing, fit everything neatly into their cliched spiritual box and by doing so, drove Job to anger and even to sin.

All the troubles that Job went through could not cause him to sin. He faced the loss of his wealth and his family with faith and dependence on God. But when his friends tried to force their false and simplistic theology on them, it did what Satan's machinations could not.

In chapter 4, we are introduced to "Educated Eliphaz" who acted like God's professor, explaining everything God did based on his outlook. Next we will meet Bildad the Blowhard and Zealous Zophar. Each has a different view but they all say the same thing - it's your fault, Job. Your sin brought this on and you need to repent.

If only they'd kept their mouths shut!

When someone is suffering, you don't need to try to do the Holy Spirit's job. You cannot explain all of the activity of the sovereign God. But you can communicate two messages to them by your words and your deeds.

• God loves you and is not going to abandon you no matter how things look. Trust God even when you don't understand him. 
• I love you and I'm not going anywhere!

Just don't be like Job's friends, who smugly thought they knew everything and that they could explain all of God's workings to a hurting man.

Father, I trust you even when I can't understand you. Help me to be a friend to those in need, not like Job's friends, but a true friend!